Location: Colon, Panama
There are many ways to test a freezer’s temperature. Some are modern. Some are sensible. And some involve someone sticking his entire head into the freezer like an ostrich does in the sand. Naturally, our crew has mastered the last method. This all started with Skyler. One day, in a moment that will live on forever in Argo crew lore, Skyler decided the best way to determine the freezer temp. was to physically insert his head inside it. This was done despite the fact that: 1. the freezer has a digital temperature display, and 2. that display is located on the wall, at eye level, and works perfectly. But why trust technology when you can simply become the thermometer? Since that day, “How to Check a freezer’s temperature” has become an ongoing joke onboard. Which brings us to today: BOAT APPRECIATION DAY. Boat appreciation, for those uninitiated, is when you show love for our wonderful vessel, Argo, that carries us across oceans by deep-cleaning every surface until you question your life choices. It’s gratitude, but with rags, bleach, and a lot of sweat. One of today’s appreciations focused on the fridge and freezer, aka the cold, forgotten abyss where lost vegetables and mysterious frozen ice forms go to retire. A full defrost was required, which meant there was no way around it someone had to climb inside both frozen waste lands.
Suddenly, Skyler’s method didn’t seem so ridiculous. One by one, we found ourselves half inside the fridge and freezer, scraping ice, wiping corners, and contorting like human origami. Heads in. Shoulders wedged. Feet dangling. If you didn’t know better, you’d think we were all personally testing the freezer temperature Skyler-style. And then came the part to discard the ice. Those tasked with scraping it out made a bold executive decision; instead of putting the ice into the sink like reasonable humans, they put it into the waste bucket, which ended up in a trash bag of who knows what else.
Predictably, once the ice started melting, the trash started dripping. A lot. Which added to the already multiple trash bags from the past week or so of voyage, also dripping mystery liquids. Thus began the Great Trash Run. Imagine hauling multiple sloshy, leaking trash bags across the dock, leaving a trail of mystery liquid behind us, and a now stickyness in my Tevas, only to be met with the final challengea marina trash bin well over six feet tall. Swinging heavy, dripping bags up and over into that bin turned out to be not our strongest moment. Coordination disappeared, and gravity took control. Pro tip: if you find yourself in this situation, let go of the bag in order for it to actually make it into the bin, and if there is a small letter on the one side, it’s probably there for a reason.
We may be slowly losing brain cells as a crew, but hey, who needs common sense anyway? I mean, personally, it’s not something I ever really had in the first place. All in all, the fridge is now spotless, the freezer defrosted, trash disposed of, and Argo officially appreciated, deeply, thoroughly, and slightly chaotically. We’re now docked, a clean boat shining, waiting for it to be our turn to go through the Panama Canal. Until then, you’ll be finding me chilling at the marina pool, savoring the fact that I can finally enjoy a cold drink of water, soda, or even a smoothie!
Much love to all of those back home, I can’t wait to tell you more fun stories and show you more incredible photos!