Location: Petite Byhaut, St. Vincent and the Grenadines

I feel like the blog is getting a bit dry, so I’m going to try something new. Our deck hose (which I have cleverly named Jos just now) sits out all day and watches us go about our business (If only someone would put the thing back in its place, I guess it’s too much to ask if only people would also turn it off instead of leaving the valve constantly open). This is a day in the life of Jos:

I guessed that it was Henry’s day to be skipper this morning because the crew got up about 20 minutes late, but the wake-up music was especially groovy. Breakfast was passed up through the hole in the ground in a usual manner; I’ve always wondered what that hole in the ground led to. After breakfast, we cleaned up. I was back in the hands of Steve, the captain, as bosun to spray the deck down. He has a gentle touch.

The crew filed back below deck, and I was left alone to sit in the sun. I heard talking come up from the companionway. They said something about the ocean, waves, energy, and surfing! It seemed really interesting, I thought! Although the crew came back up looking very sleepy (or at least what I imagine “sleepy” looks like; I am, in fact, a hose and do not sleep). Henry then was tasked with splitting the dive groups up, much like Elrond was tasked to make a decision about the group worthy of taking the ring to Mordor in Lord of the Rings. As dive group one got ready, some chose to nap on deck, some chose to work on the essays they have due tonight, but Meg and Henry decided they wanted to work on their dives and neglect all of their school responsibilities. Henry’s dives got leaps and bounds better! Meg also worked on her dives! Now comes the worst part of my day. Anytime anyone goes in the water, they always use me to clean themselves. It’s disgusting! They know that I basically am throwing up all over them, right!? gross (Some people also use me for wayyyyyyy too long and waste all the precious water that Steve spends ages refilling)

Then they had lunch. I’m not sure why these people eat Sriracha™️; they always end up having to drink so much water to try to cool their mouths down. Weaklings. Then they once again shifted below to talk about god knows what. Liam came up complaining about charts (Brahm won’t let me call them maps (Because they’re not maps)) and how much his head hurt. Johnny said that he would be confused if he knew anything about the charts, to begin with. Dive group two got their gear ready and rode off into the distance in the dinghy. I wonder what they do out there, but they can hold their breath for really long!

Now it was time for showers. I hate showers. I don’t wanna talk about it…

Meg, Katie, and Keaton had a good time swimming around the boat. I wish I knew how to swim. I also wish I had arms and legs and that I wasn’t attached to the deck. Grady and his chef team, Celia and Max, cooked up their famous (Literally no one knows about them) enchiladas. They look really tasty! I would like enchilada night a lot more if ‘Topher didn’t always spill his food. I’m the one that has to clean it up, you know. I am glad that it didn’t land on his turtle shorts; those shorts are sweet. If I could wear pants, I would get a pair for myself.

Now it’s time for me to get coiled up for the rest of the night. I love looking up at the stars and hanging out with the people on anchor watch. Being a hose is lonely, but at least I have these nice people to look after me!

Jos, the deck hose

(Hi Mom! Hi Grandma!)

Pic 1: Jos, our main character and trusty hose
Pic 2: Meg told me my thing was editing photos, so here’s me in the Council of Elrond, idk
Pic 3: The inferior dive group 1 returning from their morning dive
Pic 4: Meg (In another new bikini) learned how to fly, holy crap! That’s so cool! Meg, you gotta teach me to do that! Wow!
Pic 5: Addisen and Erin, the two most buoyant girls I know, I mean, just look at ’em
Pic 6: “My brain hurts” – Liam after being told to plot a course on a chart
Pic 7: Liam and Johnny doing something probably
Pic 8: Brahm broken today, come back tomorrow
Pic 9: Hey, there’s me! Keaton’s there too!
Pic 10: Grady chefin’ it up